Ok so I am back again tonight...My poor hubby is sick he is upstairs in bed..poor man :( He hates having to admit that he is sick and the poor boy is.
So here I am feeling not quite so bad as a few hours ago but not good. I am trying to give myself a break and not stress myself out about one bad day...I know I have reason to be stressed. Today was first day back to school, beginning of second semester, I had my schedule changed around a bit, this works for me but it has stressed some of the kids out. I feel their frustration and insecurities. I also found out that a young woman who I have worked with (very at risk, multiple issues) is pregnant and is 10 weeks. She is couch surfing and has no money...it is very likley that this baby will not be her first priority. My first thought was not why her and not me. My first thought was what can I do to help make the first months of this childs life more comforatble...Once the sex of the baby is known I am going to start collecting clothes from friends and family that their children no longer need. So with all this comes some emotion of what is to come for her and what is to come for me and how differently our childrens lives will be. The curve balls life throws at us are amazing.
I have been thinking about my 2 week wait. I am wondering why I am not anxious about it, I am not stressing a out wether or not I am pregnant. Does this mean my body is telling me that I shouldn't even bother worrying about pregnancy this cycle and look forward to the next. Or am I just protecting myself....Time will tell.