negative news

Yes it is true....the test came back negative...no baby for us this cycle.
I got the phone call at work and found it hard to hold it together for the first 20 minutes or so....sent off an email to John, my mom and my sister, a text to my cousins to let them know the news...shed about half a tear and then got back to work.
All I have been able to think of is how do they do it? How do other women who have been going through this for years keep going? How long will I keep going? How long will it take? I mean at this point there seems to be nothing seriously wrong so it shouldn't be that bad, should it? Besides these, what I feel are very normal thoughts I am looking to the future. I will go off the progesterone let my period come and start all over...although I should really get myself some annaprox or it could be rough.
I am putting myself on a ban, no baby Internet searching of any kind. Unless it is for my cousin :D Although I won't be to hard on myself if I slip up. Tonight luckily enough I have a massage scheduled, good timing huh? Then John and I will get a bite of dinner somewhere.

Tomorrow will be a better day.


  1. I just want to tell you I'm so sorry...just looking at the pic on your blog makes my heart sink. I know how you feel, how long? when? am I really starting all over on day 1? Just hang in there and know you're not alone. Enjoy that well planned massage!

  2. love you lots lisa! I know it sucks but just remember that we are sending out good thoughts and keeping fingers crossed.

    and maybe in the second round maybe I wont yell at your uterus I'll speak softly...maybe the yelling was too much?

  3. Hang in there Lisa. Don't be too hard on yourself and do let yourself be sad a bit. But most of all, just keep being you because you and John will make absolutely fabulous parents

  4. Sorry to hear this round didn't work out. I am super optimistic that it will happen for you two.


Love to hear from you!